PolyLiving- Discussing Polyamory and the Poly Life
Poly Lifestyle => The Poly Mind and Life => Topic started by: Administrator on April 29, 2012, 07:14:40 PM
(http://s14.postimage.org/5vou2th71/roots.jpg) (http://postimage.org/image/5vou2th71/) I saw this question on HAI Global's Facebook, and I thought I'd pose it here as well.
How has getting to the roots of your beliefs about love, intimacy, and sexuality changed your story?
This one to be honest was the realization of the roles that my formative years and religious indoctrination played in my views on sex, love, and family. Letting go of those religious beliefs and thinking for myself changed everything, and I mean everything, in my life including my views on love and sexuality.
Sometimes, instead of getting to the roots, you just gotta take a clipping to start anew and burn the rest down....
I think it is a constant process, I have changed so much, I feel like I am constantly evolving. I know the roots of my previous feelings (I would not necessarily say beliefs because I was not exactly fixed in my ideas) an I think most of it was social convention, luckily coming from a non religious background spared me that sort of sexual guilt but I certainly was the 'victim' of slut shaming in my time.
I have felt liberated from some of my previous assumptions about ownership, possession and belonging, it certainly was a trial by fire but it has been worth it, I look forward to experiencing more of my own personal growth in the future.
I agree that it is every changing for me. I came from a religious background too, and this background definitely shaped my beliefs about love, sexuality, and intimacy in my earlier years.
When we became poly though and my church and religion began isolating and rejecting me saying it was anti-bible, I, then, began questioning everything, and I mean everything, I ever learned from the church or my religion. It bothers me to know and makes me shudder that at one point I was anti-tolerant and extremely prejudiced against different sexualities. Now, I advocate for GBLT and poly rights.
For me, talking about sex no longer seems taboo or sinful, but natural. I realize now that love comes in various forms even for me. I feel more in touch with my self now. At one time, I didn't even like myself, and now, I've learned to love me. Learning to love myself helped me to genuinely love others completely for who they are and not what I want them to be. In order to love others though, I had to get to the roots of who I was and not what others forced me to be or to believe. I learned to take responsibility for my own thoughts, feelings, ideas, and relationships. I discovered that I am a very sexual person, and I truly enjoy sex and nothing is wrong with that like I was taught by my former religious indoctrination. I no longer feel ashamed to admit that I appreciate and am attracted to both men and women and find them both very beautiful and sexy. I have demolished my former taboos and have embraced love in all of its forms. I find the more love I place within my heart the less room I have for hate. This may sound sappy, but it is true at least for me.