September 20, 2019, 09:42:29 PM

Author Topic: Clashing Expectations AP  (Read 2219 times)

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Clashing Expectations AP
« on: April 01, 2012, 04:50:40 PM »
Sirena wrote:
 D( I keep struggling to pronounce your screen name in my head!): "It is, I think, almost to be expected that the newcomer will need particular reassurance that s/he is loved and valued, especially as s/he will be living with constant evidence of the comfortable intimacies, shared memories, shared mono-and heteronormative privileges (letters addressed to 'Mr & Mrs,' people knowing that her/his partners are a 'couple' but asking her/him if s/he is the relative / friend / lodger all the time) of the pre-existing relationships right in front of her/him all the time. ">>

As far as public explanations, I actually heard someone at a party who was accompanied by a poly partner when asked something like "and who's your friend?" , they said "it's complicated, "- (trying to ) wryly quote the facebook relationship status selection. I suppose that is a way out of explaining, but it seemed to work and made the nosy parker go away.

but....wouldn't poly people kind of expect these sorts of things and not be as bothered or even bothered by much of that? I could understand if people were living together and one person was sort of lording it about with the mail and titles and such -implication being 'I'm the operating system and you're a firefox add-on'...
The above was written by Sirena and has been cross-posted from another topic as it was off topic, and I thought it would be lost in that thread.  The quotation is from a previous post I wrote on that thread.  ~Deorccwen


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