How do you as parents deal with your teens and their newfound sexuality? They realize they may have a biological need for sex. If we look back throughout history, teens were not treated like children. They were considered adults, and were allowed to marry and live adult lives. It only makes sense that biologically speaking they would still feel the need for sexual fulfillment or love and companionship.
In our current society, our teens feel frustrated because they are taught to supress their basic biological and emotional needs until they turn 18 because this is the "magical" age when they will turn into an adult. We tell them that "True Love Waits" and to remain pure through abstinence until they marry or at least until they can be responsible for themselves and any offspring they may conceive.
In days of old, adolescence or teenagers did not exist. Our journey in life took us from childhood straight into adulthood. Young men ceased being children around 12 and young women between 12 to 14. When still children, the older adults trained the children to live like an adult and even gave them sexual advice and training. Now, we fear talking about sex, so we leave it society to teach our children about sex, or we allow their boyfriend or girlfriend to teach them in the wrong manner.
Parents seem to have relinquished their authority in the lives of their children over to the state or other people. Parents should be teaching their children how to be successful adults in today's society. We should be the ones teaching them about sex: even the how to's.
We shake our heads in disapproval at all the young pregnant teens. Yet, we have done nothing to really change it, but to try to punish our children for fulfilling a basic biological need. This is like punishing them for eating or drinking. The other thing we have done to try to keep teens from getting pregnant is to tell them to wait to abstain from sexual fulfillment. We tell them to be strong. Really? We expect them to be strong and withhold from sex when we do not even consider them to be adults? There are some parents who even teach their children that it is a sin to masterbate, so in this situation, we have taken from them all safe ways to fullfill them of their needs.
So we are back at square one. How do you as parents of teens or future parents of teens deal with your children and their newfound sexuality? Do you ignore it? Do you tell them to deny it? Do you tell them to be strong and fight their biology? know parent who tells her teens, "Do not have sex, but here are the condoms just in case, but please do not let me know if you do." Is this the right way to go? What are the alternatives?