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Author Topic: You may never find ANYBODY  (Read 4770 times)

Offline Dreamgyrl360

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You may never find ANYBODY
« on: May 04, 2012, 09:32:11 AM »
This is OUR brutal truth, at least --

Here we sit, being poly-minded (lol) for at least 6 years or so.
And there is no one on the horizon.
We try our bests not to have the "searching for unicorns" issues --
My husband finds attractive what HE finds attractive. We are not talking magazine models or video vixens or anything. What most attracts my husband is an amazing mind. If you're a 6 physically, and you've got an awesome mind and you're a nice person, a STRONG person, you're suddenly a 9 lol.
We are also very happy with each other, we have a good time, lots of laughs, lots of deep discussions and debates and opinions tossed around, we love to talk to each other, I read to him, we plan business ventures together, etc.
I think part of it is that, we HARDLY look, really. We don't ever actively seek.
Only like, 3 times has a woman crossed our radar where I'm like "You HAVE to talk to her, she's great" or he's like "I have a crush on so-n-so". In 6 years, it's been THAT rare.
And with all the videos I post about poly on youtube, with all the likes and with all the friends we have in this lifestyle, single and married --
only one person has actively pursued US.

I am lonely, in my womanhood today. Right now. I am missing a sisterwife that I do not have.
And I am trying to come to grips with the fact that we may never have that relationship, that person that is THE fit for this family.
Those of you that are feeling similar at times, you may have to come to grips with that, too.

I just wanted to say that. In the BRUTAL truths section.

Love you all.

Offline Natja

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Re: You may never find ANYBODY
« Reply #1 on: May 04, 2012, 10:45:40 AM »
Hey Dream,

Do you have any girlfriends you can spend time with?  I just spent a week with my bestie in Orlando and it was a nice girlie experience for us.  I know time with girlfriends can be restrictive, what with living apart and other responsibilities but if it is friendship you are lacking in your life perhaps it would alleviate that loneliness?

Natja
x
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Offline TamBabs

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Re: You may never find ANYBODY
« Reply #2 on: May 04, 2012, 05:08:26 PM »
Dream;

I often feel as you do. That near hunger and longing. Much like wanting to travel somewhere and never getting there. We've been searching for 3 yrs, and we *are* actively searching. Had a couple of potentials but they fizzled for one reason or another. We're also an older couple and in a somewhat isolated area. Far from anyone poly. It is a truth... there will be people who do not find their additional lifemate. I've met a few people who searched for many years.

No Nat... I have no girlfriends nearby where I can take a day or so with them. Can't take the time off work, either. I am, however, getting the grand-daughters for a few days and that will help, a lovely distraction. :)

Offline Natja

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Re: You may never find ANYBODY
« Reply #3 on: May 04, 2012, 05:44:20 PM »
So they are, my niece was around for a while today and it was lovely to see her, thank goodness for babies I say!!!!

I know it is hard in an isolated place (I was in an isolated place for a while and it is not as easy to socialise I think).  I don't really know what to suggest as time is always a factor.  Girl time is important though, try to get as much as you can.....even if it is on skype.

*cough*hint*cough*

  ;)

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Offline DeeDee

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Re: You may never find ANYBODY
« Reply #4 on: May 06, 2012, 06:06:23 AM »
Great idea, Natja! I myself am quite isolated, and with our finances the way they are, I rarely get to spend time with my friends, as they live an hour + away.  We have the Polyliving Forum Sisterhood--and as you pointed out, Natja, Skype makes cyberfriends a bit more real.

~D

Offline Natja

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Re: You may never find ANYBODY
« Reply #5 on: May 06, 2012, 11:26:59 AM »
Thanks Dee, I am just updating my Skype now so I can use it more often!!

N
x
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Offline Dreamgyrl360

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Re: You may never find ANYBODY
« Reply #6 on: May 09, 2012, 05:01:25 PM »
When my besties are around we have a great time.
We are: two married, one engaged (who's wedding we're planning), one divorcing.

We all also have 3 kids apiece. 2 live in the same area, one lives on the other side of town and the other lives in another, smaller town.

:-/

When we get together it's great.
When we CANT get together, which is MOST of the time, it's sad.
We keep in touch on the pc, or thru texting.
We love the time we spend together and wish we could do more.
I will be moving across country at the end of the summer.


So sometimes when it's been two weeks with just me and the kiddies, and I've been cleaning and cooking and teaching and all the things mommies do -- I look up and I'm like "...where's my sisterwife?"
Maybe we can drink tea and talk. Discuss politics. Discuss business. Discuss Bible. Talk about what's next on our agenda. How's our day been? Laugh about the lady at the store the other day.
*Sigh* SAME stuff I talk to hubby about.
But, you know. Different.

 


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